So to break this cycle, we need to REMAIN the attractive guy, the alpha male.
You see, relationships can make us guys too lazy (since the sex is so easy) and we lose that "high value" mindset. It's crucial to keep that alpha male frame of mind that says, "I am like a Lamborghini."
Do Lamborghini dealerships grovel to try to get people to like them? Of course not. Instead they allow all the buyers to come to them. Hell, Lamborghini doesn't even advertise. As a man, you should have a similar confident mindset if you want to maximize the attraction your girlfriend feels for you.
So, how do you keep that alpha mindset? First and foremost, avoid chasing your girlfriend like a puppy dog. A basic concept which will prevent her from ever treating you badly is what I call Punishment and Reward.
If a woman engages in behavior which you disapprove of, punish her by withdrawing your time and focusing on something (or someone) else. If she does something you like (such as having sex with you), reward her by giving her more of your time, talking about her feelings, etc.
So whenever you do something nice for her, do it because you're rewarding her. And DO reward her good behavior, if you want more of it. Like I said, Punishment and Reward.
Then there's the issue of being a challenge. Women act sweet when you're a challenge to them. They act bitchy when they take you for granted and no longer feel like they need put out effort to win your affections.
Often by around month 6 in a relationship is when a woman really starts to take a guy for granted, so avoid that by remaining a challenge.
So the solution to remaining the attractive, alpha guy in your relationships is threefold:
1. Always be willing to focus your time on things other than your girlfriend. Don't reward her for acting bitchy by continuing to be around her when she does. On the other hand, too, reward her for good behavior by giving her more of your time when she acts sweet.
2. Always have it in the back of your mind that you could end the relationship at any time. Don't explicitly threaten her with that, but just make it a subtle implication. That way she'll never become truly comfortable with the relationship and will keep working to win you.
3. Always allow her to think that's she's just a little bit more interested
in you than you are in her. Again, this can be very subtle, but if (for example)
you're telling her 20 times a day that you love her, and she's only telling
you that twice, then obviously the situation is badly out of whack.
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Well, good news. There is a very easy, no-risk way to do this. I call it the Fated Encounter Technique.
Here's why it works. Every woman has a fantasy from the time she was a little girl, triggered by a constant diet of romance movies and novels, about fate bringing the man of her dreams to her.
In one typical scene the guy and the girl almost bump into each other on the sidewalk. Instead, fate keeps them apart, and they go their separate ways.
Then, two years later, they live in the same apartment building. Yet after several close calls, they still don't meet, again because of fate.
The two date other people, off and on, and yet are never happy. Months go by. The man and the woman each ponder what it will be like when they meet that special someone, someday...
And then near the end of the movie, fate finally brings them together. And of course they hit it off right from the start.
Wouldn't it be nice if that could happen in real life, rather than having to wait through several dates before the woman finally feels comfortable enough with you to have sex?
Well, it can. You can speed the seduction process and have the woman feeling deeply connected with you by using my Fated Encounter Technique. I'll explain how it works.
During the course of your conversation with the woman, you bring up places she has been to. If you've been to those same places, you then talk about how amazing it is that the two of you could have been there at the same time and yet destiny kept you apart.
Let's say, to use a recent example I encountered, that she shops at the local Whole Foods grocery store.
You can then say, "That's awesome. I shop there too. Imagine, we've probably seen each other there all the time!"
Another example would be that the two of you go to downtown LA all the time, and probably have walked past each other on many occasions.
And now, you can say, "Isn't it amazing how fate has finally brought us together?"
As the conversation progresses, the two of you can talk about other coincidences, and the things the two of you might have done together if you'd only known each other.
With the seed planted, as the girl thinks about those coincidences, and how "fate" has now brought the two of you together, she will then start to feel as if she's known you, on a deeper psychic level, for a lot longer than just a few hours.
You, she concludes, are the man she's been waiting for all her life.
My goal was to find the things that they all agreed on.
The results were surprising, because the issues the women had the strongest opinions about were ones that most guys would never think of.
1. YOUR TEETH. Bad teeth are "just gross" said one blonde bombshell, to the enthusiastic agreement of the others.
So in order to not have your teeth immediately disqualify you, keep them brushed twice a day, flossing at least once. And if they're rotten or badly stained, see your dentist ASAP.
However, don't go crazy with the teeth whitener. "No one wants to kiss Chiclet Mouth," added the blonde.
2. YOUR HANDS. Women notice right off the bat if your hands are covered with dirt or grease.
"If you work with your hands," said one woman, "that's not the first thing a woman should notice about you."
So auto mechanics, construction workers, and other blue collar types, listen up.
"It's not what a person does," explained another chick. "It's just about taking care of yourself. If you can't even wash your hands, what does that say about you?"
3. YOUR CLOTHES. When you're wearing jeans, leave the tennis shoes at home.
"I am a believer that athletic gear is for exercise," said a part-time model in her mid-20s. "Some boys wear only tennis shoes and that's just annoying. It shows immaturity."
Good shoes instead are loafers or boots.
Try to be neat without being anal. "You should not look sloppy," said the blonde, "but don't look so put together that you appear obsessive-compulsive."
And, be an individual, agreed the women. If you've got that one shirt that only you love, you should still wear it, even if it is somewhat "uncool." For example, take a hawaiian shirt with a flamingo on it. Some guy who absolutely loves it can wear that shirt.
So the bottom line is that a few guys can indeed pull off wearing the tennis shoes.
Sound confusing? It isn't once you realize that the simple test is this: Are you wearing clothes that display your core personality?
As one woman explained it, "You should be comfortable with what you're wearing and like what you're wearing, because women will pick up on that."
So in other words, the perfect style for you comes down to personal preferences and your individual sense of style. You can't make one rule for everything, except just be your genuine self.
If you do it too, it's a way of getting under a woman's radar and making her comfortable enough around you so that she'll be receptive to sex without making you wait.
You see, in order for a typical woman to have sex with a man, she must have feelings of comfort. It is not enough for her to simply feel attraction for the guy.
Let's say you meet a girl at a 5 PM happy hour. The two of you hit it off, having a great conversation. She's laughing. She's interested. You entrance her by telling her fascinating stories about your life. The two of you have good rapport.
Around 7:30, you get hungry and invite her to get something to eat. Dinner goes well too. Then dinner ends. Now what?
Around this time, a lot of guys get confused about how to advance the interaction forward. Clearly the goal is to get laid, but the roadmap is often muddled.
Usually the night ends with the woman saying something like, "I had great time meeting you. Call me. Bye!"
Often, the need for comfort is why women like to make guys wait before sex.
(If the guy's lucky, it might be only three dates, but with a lot of women, the guy can be made to wait for months.)
Fortunately, there's a way to shortcircuit that barrier. I call it the "Boyfriending Technique."
If you watch couples who are in close relationships, you'll notice an interesting phenomenon. The man and woman are extremely comfortable touching each other, so much so that they'll even do seemingly gross things like brush sleep ("eye boogers") out of each other's eyes.
It's a behavior that's only done by people who are completely comfortable around each other. Certainly when you are in a relationship where you can brush sleep out of a woman's eye, you've long since passed the point where the two of you are comfortable having sex.
Catch my drift? You can use this as a psychological weapon to make the woman feel more comfortable around you.
In mid-conversation, tell her to hold still and close her eyes. Pretend there's sleep in her eye, and make her believe that you just brushed it off.
Later, after the two of you finish eating and leave the restaurant, again tell her to hold still. With your finger, brush off an imaginary piece of food from her lower lip.
The net result of the Boyfriending Technique is nuclear. First, it sub-communicates that the two of you are very comfortable around each other.
Second, it involves you touching her face, bringing your heads closer together and progressing towards a make out session.
Third, in the case of you touching her lower lip, you're in fact touching an erogenous zone. That's right... a woman's lower lip has a high concentration of nerve endings. Stimulating her lower lip makes her body release sex hormones.
Make the Boyfriending Technique a part of your dating arsenal, and you'll find more success than ever before. You may just be having sex within several hours instead of having to wait several months.
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